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Nature's Pocket

by Razor Cunts

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1.
Brat Attack 02:04
wanna kiss my candy lips, touch my lady lovely hips fire breathing look at me, I'm not a bird and not for free my dirty thoughts are not for you, not unless i want them too i'm not your damsel in distress, just because i wear a dress Hey there boy all dressed in black You smell like a shark attack I don’t like your sicky genius Googly eyes stuck on your penis Sucker punch and beeline feet You’re cuter when you’re made of meat I don’t like your blah blah mouth So why don’t you just spit it out something something blah blah blah I don't wanna see your dong, DING all my lovely panty lickers in teensy tiny shiny knickers go on bikes with rainbow streamers, fly a kite, all be dreamers all the voices that say you can't, don't listen to their crazy rants all be roaring fuzzy kittens, and slap the baddies with your mittens Hey there boy with stomach flu I sleep in till half past two Bring me ice cream, feed me candy Cherry stalks could come in handy Bake me cakes with plastic horses Caviar for second courses  Put a gumball in your mouth To shut you up to kick you out rip it up panting, fluff it up prancing invading my space, leave this place covered in goo, what cha gonna do? Ask for it again, but we are through Don't tell me bout your baby cheeses, all i want is what pleases birthday cakes made of wishes, lots of sexy spicy dishes dancing in my unterhosen, don't ask me ever who I'm blowing we want sandy happy beaches, not so many preachy leeches Hey there boy all made of plastic Slinky stretchy so elastic Your neck smells like creepy pasta When you puke I puke back faster When you cry I steal your shoes Riot girls got less to lose Eat my crisis if you’re able Lick the crumbs from out my table
2.
Waiting for a gayer date or a guinea pig in a roller skate or the coffee beans to percolate or for glitter in my ejaculate or the patriarchy to abdicate  or Jane to play with me kill, marry hate or someone to watch me masturbate or waiting, still, we’re nicht zu spät Everyone is just waiting.  Waiting for the fish to bite 
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
 or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting Waiting for her sexy look or waiting for my published book or waiting for the boy to puke or waiting for abortion rights or equal pay, or more love bites or a sack of stars, or shiny hats or tuning guitars, or more black cats Everyone is just waiting Everyone is just waiting C'mon we're going C'mon we're going – ah hu There's nothing to see here, unless we make it be here bubble gum kisses and riding on a unicorn, is totally for us C'mon we're going – ah huh C'mon we're going sprinkle showers of rainbows glittering ain't gonna happen if we're sitting around WAITING
3.
mermaids wrapped in silky seaweed, eyes fire-y emeralds of coral diamonds close your eyes my wayward daughter / come to see me from the shore here’s a pelt for round your shoulders / here’s a snorkel for your throat seven tears for seven sisters / drag your body through the waves  when you reach me you’ll get fisted / when you reach me you’ll be saved tease my tongue with your salt water breath, i will wipe the tears from your sea-worn cheeks, you found your nipple in an oyster of the sea, i put it between my desperate teeth I will take you to my Finfolk / bring you to the Hildaland  paradise is fog and free lube / slick me up and hold my hand  here we are out in the ocean / things are swooping from the sky when you scream your voice is broken / when you’re out here you are mine  Seven sisters silent sirens teasing tongues of the sea. Mermaids wrapped in silky seaweed. Scurvy kisses. My citrus knees. Fisting firey-emeralds, fisting paradises please. Mermaids wrapped in silky seaweed. Scurvy kisses. My citrus knees. cloak me in your Finnish fin and fuck me hard and fast on the fjordy rocks barnacles tear deep grooves in my skin, you lick me all up when i cum violently everything is getting colder / sink beneath the siren song at the bottom I’ll play mentor / teach you how to play along without tails we are just drowning / without gills you can’t catch me bats are walnuts of the ocean / bats are walnuts of the sea fuck me hard and fast on the fjordy rocks, I cum violently when you lick me all up I'll scurvy for your citrus breasts, your silky seaweed emerald hair, teach me to play along oyster nipples of Atlantis, coral diamonds between my teeth bats are walnuts of the ocean / bats are walnuts of the sea bats are walnuts of the ocean / bats are walnuts of the sea
4.
It's a Thing 02:33
we gotta live in a time that's stupid – We have to take it take it take it, take the material world too many whiny damn dudes sticking it hard – you think they'll mind if you stick it back YEAH, THAT'S A THING pony play plastic hooves and a unicorn horn – Well take it, take it, take it, take the material world suicidal dolphin LSD hand-jobs – toddlers in tiaras, And negging, don't you ever neg me won't take it, WHOA HO – You take it, WHOA HO let's burn it, WHOA HO – a garbage dump in the middle of your brain will you just stop with the shoulders up... – and your tongue hanging out your mouth… The lighting strikes and your head is bursting out your eeeeeeyes would you stop, would you stop, would you stop, would you stop, would you stop, would you stop YOU'RE A THING reality shows, global warming, anti-abortion laws – Paying women in a third world country to have a baby for them – nouns, they're person, places and things.... – Yeah, these are all things, very much thingy-things THAT'S A THING IT'S A THING – A REAL THING – THAT'S A THING – A DIRTY THING
5.
Nightmares 02:55
There is this person, they think they're great The kind that gets all over your face, in your head wrap it up in plastic and get rid of it stop calling, my number's not in service these are the details to a very scary film no they're not, but I wish they were It's all creepy like Freddie Kruger real striped shirt won't leave me alone Nightmares. You give me nightmares Nightmares. I don't care. In my dirty underwear. I don't care. I don't care. I have dirty underwear I don't care. I don't care, they give me nightmares. Don't touch my hair. I love my hair. Cause you give me dirty underwear. Nightmares nightmares nightmares I don't care. This person pooed on my head-hard-drive I go to bed and think of them They think they're made of licorice and caramel Don't eat it, it will rot your teeth Beep beep beep. Beep beep beep.
6.
Turpentine 03:31
TURPENTINE 909 from 3 min Jane screechy riff + drum / ride you show up... in the nighttime and you say, yeah you wanna get like this it's garbage and it's dangerous, it's raining down on your face and it's crazy. And it's crazy. And the women they don't want to stand outside and breath nothing from a human man. And you've been upset cause you've got nothing inside but shame and regret-tet-tet-tet whoooooooooaaa shake your maness you make it make you lie what would it take to save you and change your mind? generations are lost in these clementines what is this... this is it.. will you change it? Have you gotten me wet with your backwash? Climax. All over me. It's all the rage. Ride a horse into the sunset with the time with the time with the time doesssssssssssssn't it Turpentine turpentine turpentine turpentine backwash backwash backwash backwash coming at you in the bar at seventeen thousand kilowatts an hour and I am feeling better when you're getting me all wet with your backwash wet with your backwash wet with your backwash coming all over me like dental floss I tie you up with dental floss dental floss I tie you up with dental floss make a cutting in your room clementines all in your arms turpentine can be such bliss it's difficult difficult make a cutting of your dream plant it for a later treat why don't you want horses hooves? I like you when you are feeling good good good I like you when you are feeling better a-bout being a body in the bedroom horses horses horses horses in the mirror horses horses horses a pony in the bedroom time time time time time turpentine time time turpentine
7.
In a choke hold standing on the threshold, ladies in pantsuits doing all the cock holds P for Patriarchy doesn't really please me, we didn't ask for eternity on our knees with these sweaty white balls hang 'em on the fir trees, they're on fire garnish them with all the pretty daisies Marie one, two, Chytilova's beauty queen high heel sweeties wet dreams make me scream teams DIE DIE DIE Die Die In the service of the Minister who's not my sister, it's super all seriously hyper crazy sinister Witch Craze, College Haze, it makes me do the spell of rage, menstrual thralls worship me smear it on the lovers' walls get your hammers and your stomping boots and magic wands, smash and burn, burn and smash till your lips are filled with cotton ash Hey Marie, you want some of my lovely cake? Just so you know I'm a fucking gorgeous and proud snowflake Die DIE DIE Die Die All the boys with their boy toys simple joys, talking over me, mansplaining chimpanzees nasty nasties sucking all your dignity, don't forget all the self-entitled jackassery there'll be sanctuary in papa P's obituary, remember when we'll say, its chewed up guts spill down on our chins Dial 1-800 fuck that shit. Fuck it now. These superheroes gonna kick its ass to infinity Die DIE DIE Die Die in the end when our genitalia has smote thee, and the sky is full of sparkly rainbow candy we'll ride naked on our unicorn pegai, covered in orgasmic glitter, fancy bells and lacy frills I'll lick your teeth as we gallop off into the sunset, as you tell me that we've finally beat it. We'll all be free but until then we'll all need to yell, hey Mr. Patriarchy, please go to hell
8.
Cock Rock 03:22
9.
Justin Time 01:58
Justin Time close your eyes and scream outside your little mind Let's poke the party with a nose ring, plucked from a darling when their sleeping Justin Time can fall down stairs and stand right up but who really cares They think he's great because he's hot, but is hot enough to save us lot? Justin Time, they keep saying, cause everything is ripped and snagged like fish net stockings on bloody knees, yes i would kiss him but i'm not picky
10.
Telephone 01:53
11.
Tampon Mouth 06:05

about

After their first EP "Chickmeat", "Nature's Pocket" is Razor Cunts' new album. Iconoclastic, dissonant and yet very pop, Razor Cunts' songs put together feminist anthems and a dark cabaretesque humor using as main instruments two surprising, beautiful, dreamy but also abrasive cellos. Bloody.

from the Quietus:
"Like similarly aurally imperfect and good-humoured outfits such as The Frogs or Half Japanese, the seriousness of Razor Kunts’ social commentary - that is to smash the fucking patriarchy and teach thick people to stop assaulting girls amongst other things - is only emboldened by the fun energy and rough delivery. Brilliant!"

from SWIT:
"Yes, this is truly extraordinary, in your face agitpop. Feminism with a capital FUCK. Darkdark humour, keeling over, teetering vocals, accents for the multiverse. A dream, thus: The B52s are playing at your 21st birthday party where their instruments have turned to jelly and later they're attacked and stabbed to death by a mutant Siouxsie Sioux, who's just fallen through a musical penis-shaped time tunnel directly from 1978. That kind of thing. That kind of record."

credits

released August 25, 2017

All songs written, arranged, performed and recorded by Razor Cunts. Razor Cunts are Ambika Thompson and Jane Flett.
Mixing by Ambika Thompson, mastering by Ambika Thompson and Richie Murphy.
Track 6 ("Turpentine") recorded live by Orange Ear in Berlin, 19.06.16
orange-ear.de?project=razor-cunts

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Razor Cunts Berlin, Germany

Recipe: Add The Raincoats, Lydia Lunch, Miranda July, Bikini Kill, Yoko Ono, X Ray Spex, ESG and Mary Poppins and mix in a blender for roughly 25-30 years. Then spice with cellos and stripes and dirty words and drums and distortion and love.

Voila! You've been Razor Cunted.

Starring Jane Flett and Ambika Thompson
... more

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